welcome
karm iskander
egyption plastic artist
When you walk into a quiet bar and order your cocktail, you might notice that the bartender looks very busy, wiping up, chatting with co-workers or watching the television. But don't think we don't notice our patrons. We might not always be inclined to tell you our life story (okay, we're never inclined to tell you our life story), but we like to guess at yours.
Bartenders are in a unique position to spy on dates, reunions and other human interactions that most of the population misses altogether. Blind date? Oh yes, we can tell. Jerk on cell phone with bored companion? Far too common. Love at first sight? Very rare. In fact, I'm still looking for evidence.
Couple #1 - Sally and Tim
Sally and Tim met at the bar when a mutual friend invited them out. Situated in a large group, I noticed that their eyes kept returning to each other. She laughed at his jokes, and he angled to sit next to her. Discreetly, I pointed the pair out to a fellow bartender, who after a few minutes of observation remarked, "It's on."
However, I am reluctant to categorize this attraction as love at first site. Sally obviously found Tim attractive and funny. The same went to for him, and I might have been a witness to a powerful moment of love ever after. But isn't love more complex than a tipsy mutual lust? Perhaps only one kind of love at first sight - the fleeting, giddy kind - is actually possible.
Couple #2 - Sara and Christopher
Sara and Christopher met at my bar the following week. It was obvious that this was their first date, although I have no idea what circumstances brought them together. The date was not going well.
It seemed that each was only mildly interested in the other. Both were moderately attractive but probably put themselves in a higher category than their respective dates. Bland conversation continued, and I noticed that each quickened the pace of their wine intake.
You might think that this date would end early or fizzle out neatly into a boring anecdote. However, a passing reference by Christopher to a Jonathan Richman concert lit up Sara's eyes. She had been at the same concert and was a devoted fan. They both started quoting, then shyly singing Richman's sweet, romantic lyrics and instantly reevaluated each other. Their chatter picked up speed, and the wine glasses were abandoned. I couldn't believe it. What was this? Love at first... shared taste in balladeers?
This second couple exhibited a much more exciting interaction to me than the first. Why? Sometime after college, all of us - even men - start placing higher importance on qualities other than looks. And the result is simple: love is built on ever more solid ground. Oh sure, I do get nostalgic for the days when I could grin at a strange boy and quicken his heart rate effortlessly. And I wouldn't mind an ode to my smile, eyes, hair, boobs... whatever. But I truly feel loved when I'm connecting with another person over a shared perception, experience or emotion. Let me tell you about my own love-at-first-shared-cocktail story.
Couple #3 - Me and my beau
I worked with my current boyfriend for eight months before I realized he was, so to speak, prime real estate. We talked a little at work but never about anything too substantial. I thought his hair was too long and shaggy, and his smoking during those days rendered him undateable in my eyes.
Feeling a little lonely after work one night, I went out with some of my co-workers and started really talking to them... one in particular. Soon after, I came home proclaiming to my roommate, "I'm in love!"
In my case, I fell for an unlikely candidate because when he finally opened his mouth in my direction, beautiful words came out and touched me. It was, of course, love at first listen.
A year later, it's love for a whole assortment of reasons. I am reminded at this point in the story of a couple who comes into my bar every few months and orders two tumblers of fine scotch, neat. I like them because they tip well, they look pleasingly intellectual, and after what I'm guessing is decades of coupledom, they look genuinely happy to be together. Who knows what they've experienced as a pair? Who knows what sparked their love? All I can say is, they have what I want... whether it begins at first sight or otherwise.
Time to test the theory of love at first sight for yourself! Search for local singles today! Romance could be waiting right around the corner!
Bartenders are in a unique position to spy on dates, reunions and other human interactions that most of the population misses altogether. Blind date? Oh yes, we can tell. Jerk on cell phone with bored companion? Far too common. Love at first sight? Very rare. In fact, I'm still looking for evidence.
Couple #1 - Sally and Tim
Sally and Tim met at the bar when a mutual friend invited them out. Situated in a large group, I noticed that their eyes kept returning to each other. She laughed at his jokes, and he angled to sit next to her. Discreetly, I pointed the pair out to a fellow bartender, who after a few minutes of observation remarked, "It's on."
However, I am reluctant to categorize this attraction as love at first site. Sally obviously found Tim attractive and funny. The same went to for him, and I might have been a witness to a powerful moment of love ever after. But isn't love more complex than a tipsy mutual lust? Perhaps only one kind of love at first sight - the fleeting, giddy kind - is actually possible.
Couple #2 - Sara and Christopher
Sara and Christopher met at my bar the following week. It was obvious that this was their first date, although I have no idea what circumstances brought them together. The date was not going well.
It seemed that each was only mildly interested in the other. Both were moderately attractive but probably put themselves in a higher category than their respective dates. Bland conversation continued, and I noticed that each quickened the pace of their wine intake.
You might think that this date would end early or fizzle out neatly into a boring anecdote. However, a passing reference by Christopher to a Jonathan Richman concert lit up Sara's eyes. She had been at the same concert and was a devoted fan. They both started quoting, then shyly singing Richman's sweet, romantic lyrics and instantly reevaluated each other. Their chatter picked up speed, and the wine glasses were abandoned. I couldn't believe it. What was this? Love at first... shared taste in balladeers?
This second couple exhibited a much more exciting interaction to me than the first. Why? Sometime after college, all of us - even men - start placing higher importance on qualities other than looks. And the result is simple: love is built on ever more solid ground. Oh sure, I do get nostalgic for the days when I could grin at a strange boy and quicken his heart rate effortlessly. And I wouldn't mind an ode to my smile, eyes, hair, boobs... whatever. But I truly feel loved when I'm connecting with another person over a shared perception, experience or emotion. Let me tell you about my own love-at-first-shared-cocktail story.
Couple #3 - Me and my beau
I worked with my current boyfriend for eight months before I realized he was, so to speak, prime real estate. We talked a little at work but never about anything too substantial. I thought his hair was too long and shaggy, and his smoking during those days rendered him undateable in my eyes.
Feeling a little lonely after work one night, I went out with some of my co-workers and started really talking to them... one in particular. Soon after, I came home proclaiming to my roommate, "I'm in love!"
In my case, I fell for an unlikely candidate because when he finally opened his mouth in my direction, beautiful words came out and touched me. It was, of course, love at first listen.
A year later, it's love for a whole assortment of reasons. I am reminded at this point in the story of a couple who comes into my bar every few months and orders two tumblers of fine scotch, neat. I like them because they tip well, they look pleasingly intellectual, and after what I'm guessing is decades of coupledom, they look genuinely happy to be together. Who knows what they've experienced as a pair? Who knows what sparked their love? All I can say is, they have what I want... whether it begins at first sight or otherwise.
Time to test the theory of love at first sight for yourself! Search for local singles today! Romance could be waiting right around the corner!